


What do You Mean You're Not Dating!?

by NextTrickAnvils



Category: Persona 5
Genre: And a quick reference to December spoilers too, Don't take this entirely too seriously, F/M, Kinda Cracky, October/November spoilers, Ryuji and Ann are goddamn oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 15:04:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16221569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NextTrickAnvils/pseuds/NextTrickAnvils
Summary: Every member of the Phantom Thieves knew that Ryuji Sakamoto and Ann Takamaki were in love with each other... every member except Ryuji Sakamoto and Ann Takamaki





	What do You Mean You're Not Dating!?

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a very silly conversation over at the RyuAnn Discord server about everyone in the game thinking Ryuji and Ann are dating. Hope you enjoy~

**AKIRA**

 

“So do you mind me asking you something Saka… Ryuji?”

 

Ryuji briefly glanced at Akira before returning to his beef bowl.

 

“Uh yeah sure dude, go ahead.” He replied with a mouthful of food

 

“Is Takamaki your girlfriend?”

 

Akira nearly panicked when Ryuji choked on his food. He quickly started patting his back and handing him a glass of water.

 

After gulping down half the glass, Ryuji turned to Akira with an incredulous look on his face.

 

“Dude what the hell!? Me and Takamaki!?”

 

“What? It seemed obvious. You were staring when that Cognitive version of her showed up.”

 

“Yeah cause it was a hot girl in a bikini.”

 

“Also when we first met, you were rushing to stop her from getting into Kamoshida’s car.”

 

“I would have done that for anyone! Look man, me and Takamaki knew each other in middle school but we weren’t like super close or anything. Once we started going to Shujin, we were even more… not… close. Point is dude… stop being weird.”

 

There was something in Ryuji’s voice as he mentioned how “not close” he and Takamaki were but Akira decided to drop it. It was obvious that Ryuji was done talking about this.

 

“...Whatever you say.”

 

* * *

 

**YUSUKE**

 

Ann Takamaki was perfect.

 

She was precisely what Yusuke needed for his next piece… her companions less so.

 

The garishly dressed blonde boy in particular (Sakamoto if he recalls correctly) insisted on being a thorn in Yusuke’s side. If it wasn’t his protests against Takamaki-san modeling; it was his accusations of plagiarism against Sensei.

 

At the very least with the few times he’s seen Takamaki-san and Sakamoto interact, he understood his trepidation about the modeling a little better. He may not have experience in love but Yusuke could sympathize with the idea of someone wanting to protect their significant other.

 

“We’re here to keep an eye on you, so don’t try anything perverted. ‘Kay?”

 

...Sympathy however could only go so far.

 

“Stop making such odd assumptions. Takamaki-san only interests me as a model, I have no intention of stealing her away from you.”

 

There was a pause as everyone in the room took in what he had just said.

 

“Huh?” asked Takamaki

 

“Wait? What?” asked Sakamoto

 

Yusuke faced Takamaki-san, “Did I not make myself clear? My interest in you is purely professional and platonic in nature and...”

 

“N-no, no I got that part but...”

 

“The hell do you mean “stealing her away from you?”” interrupted Sakamoto

 

Yusuke looked at him with confusion, surely he couldn’t be this oblivious.

 

“I am merely attempting to assuage your fears. Takamaki-san is my model, nothing more. Honestly, even with your limited knowledge of the art world, I would think you would be excited to see your beloved immortalized.”

 

It was then that the third member of Takamaki-san’s group burst into laughter and the confused expression on Sakamoto became one of incredulity.

 

“My what!? Dude, what the hell!?”

 

Yusuke was getting rather tired of repeating himself.

 

“Wouldn’t you like to see your significant other be recognized as a model for the arts? If Sensei allows it, I would also be more than happy to give you your own copy of the painting.”

 

At this point, Sakamoto’s speech had devolved into pure gibberish, his black haired companion started to laugh so hard that he was legitimately choking, and from the corner of his eye; Yusuke could see Takamaki-san trying to hide the fact that her face was turning a rather bright shade of red.

 

Despite all that chaos, Yusuke swore that he could also hear the whining of a cat.

 

* * *

 

**MAKOTO**

 

The closeness between Ann and Ryuji was one of the first things Makoto noticed when she started investigating the Thieves.

 

If neither of them weren’t spending the day with Akira during break and after class, they’d be at each other’s sides. It didn’t escape the notice of other students as well.

 

_“Oh yeah ever since the incident with Suzui, Takamaki and Sakamoto have practically been inseparable.”_

 

_“Kamoshida messed both of them up so I guess they’re comforting each other or something.”_

 

Not the happiest start to a relationship but Makoto could see how two victims of a cruel man found solace in each other.

 

“Makoto? Earth to Makoto!”

 

Makoto was snapped out of her thoughts by Ann’s hand on her shoulder.

 

“It’s your turn to order!”

 

“O-oh! I’m sorry, I’ll have the matcha ice cream crepe please.”

 

Once Ann paid and the two were given their crepes, she and Makoto found a spot where they wouldn’t get in the way and began to talk.

 

Makoto quickly realized just how different speaking with Ann was compared to talking to her fellow student council members or Sae. She even found herself blushing once or twice over Ann’s questioning.

 

“Really? No secret admirers for The Student Council President?~”

 

“If there were, I had no idea. I’m not much of an expert in love. That seems more your area of expertise.”

 

Ann gave Makoto a confused look as she took another bite of her dessert.

 

“Really? What gave you that idea?” she asked with a mouthful of crepe

 

“Well you and Ryuji seem quite happy...”

 

Ann let out a muffled shout as her eyes widened and she nearly dropped her crepe. She quickly swallowed the food in her mouth and turned to Makoto with a dumbfounded expression on her face.

 

“Me and Ryuji!? What are you talking about!?”

 

“Aren’t you two together? You seemed awfully close.”

 

“G-geez! We…! I mean! It’s not like that! Ryuji’s… me and Ryuji are like… he’s like a sibling to me, that’s all!”

 

Ann then proceeded to stuff more of her crepe into her mouth, making it clear that she was done with this conversation.

 

‘Like siblings… never in my life have I or my sister looked at each other the way those two look at each other’ thought Makoto

 

* * *

 

 

**FUTABA**

 

Those two were at it again.

 

When Futaba put that bug in LeBlanc, she just wanted to check on Sojiro and possibly learn more about that fluffy haired guy staying at the cafe for the year. She wasn’t expecting to discover the Phantom Thieves of Hearts that everyone online had been talking about.

 

She also wasn’t expecting a goddamn real life slow-burn mutual pining fanfic!

 

_“Hey! I was gonna eat that!”_

 

_“Ya snooze, ya lose.”_

 

At first it was kind of funny and a little endearing. It was like a dumber version of all the bad flirting between Sojiro and mom. Then it just became frustrating. Like when Featherman tried to do the “Will They Won’t They” shtick with Yellow and Pink and it just got annoying. But this was even worse because of instead of bad writers it was two very real very stupid people.

 

_“Ryuji! Give that to me, right now!”_

 

_“What’s the magic word?~”_

 

Futaba groaned. But if the comments from the other Thieves and that soft slapping noise she occasionally hears (pretty sure it’s a facepalm, too quiet for a headdesk) are any indication at least she isn’t suffering alone.

 

* * *

 

 

**HARU**

 

While Haru had only just recently joined the Phantom Thieves, she feels like she’s known the individual team members for so much longer.

 

Ryuji-kun in particular has been so kind to her. From helping her get used to fighting in the Metaverse or to right now lending her a sympathetic ear.

 

“That asshole’s still pissy over Mona trying to scratch his leg? It’s been almost a week!”

 

“I had to sit through a whole rant about Mona-chan “ruining” those pants. Including where he imported them from and how much they cost him.” Haru replied as she continued to stir her coffee.

 

Every time she thought that Sugimura couldn’t be more petty, childish, and awful, he goes and proves her wrong. Ryuji takes a gulp of his soda and rolls his eyes.

 

“Geez. That guy’s a real effin’ piece of shit and your dad is expecting you to marry him and live with him!”

 

“I know.” She sighed

 

Ryuji then gives her that big smile of his, “Hey, I know it’s rough right now but don’t worry Haru. We’re getting real close to the you-know-what! Then your dad’s gonna get better and you can get away from that asshat. Maybe you’ll be able to find somebody way better for ya too!”

 

Haru smiles back, “It would be nice to be able have a proper relationship with someone who cares. Maybe something like what you and Ann-chan have.”

 

His smile drops and Ryuji just looks at her with confusion.

 

“What… me and Ann have?”

 

“Of course! You two are so close and comfortable with each other.”

 

Ryuji scratches the back of his head, “I mean… yeah that’s kind of what friends do and I like to think we’re already friends with ya, Haru.”

 

Haru was about to respond when it occurred to her that maybe Ryuji and Ann were trying to keep their relationship a secret. (Images of an upset Mona-chan popped into her head.) So instead she smiled and winked at Ryuji (who now looked even more confused.)

 

“You’re right. I’m glad to have you all as friends.”

 

* * *

 

 

**AKECHI**

 

Goro couldn’t care less about the individual members of the Phantom Thieves. (Kurusu was an exception though that wouldn’t last since he would be dealt with in the near future.)

 

But there was… something about them that he can’t explain. Maybe it was a feeling of superiority from seeing just how foolish and in the dark his opponents are. (He ignores Robin Hood’s whispers of companionship and comfort in the back of his mind.)

 

Whatever it was, it made it easier for Goro to slip into his public (metaphorical) persona.

 

Which was especially useful right now since he was stuck in LeBlanc’s attic with Sakura, Okumura, Sakamoto, and Takamaki. (Kurusu and the cat needed to get supplies for today’s infiltration, Kitagawa had to travel from Kosei which took a while, and Niijima had to take care of student council business.)

 

Okumura was tolerable since aside from some attempts at small talk, she usually kept to herself. Sakura could be a pain but she was currently busy on her laptop so that was one less annoyance. Sakamoto and Takamaki on the other hand…

 

“Ryujiii!~” Takamaki whined

 

“Whaaaat?~” Sakamoto responded in a tone mocking hers

 

Goro resisted the urge to roll his eyes as Takamaki practically climbed into Sakamoto’s lap and the two started play fighting over some magazine. There was PDA and then there was being without shame.

 

Separately, Goro found them to be the most annoying in this little group. Together, their antics were enough to give him a cavity induced headache.

 

But as much as he would love to end this idiotic song and dance and let these two know what he truly thinks, he had a role to play. So he let out a small chuckle. Sakamoto and Takamaki ceased their bickering and stared at him.

 

“Oh! I apologize it’s just… you two have to be the youngest old married couple I have ever seen.”

 

Goro could only describe what happened afterwards as chaos. First Sakura burst into laughter then the two blondes started blushing, sputtering denials and excuses, and pushing each other away.

 

“Wait… you two aren’t together?”

 

Sakura stopped laughing long enough to mutter, “Welcome to our world.”

 

Okumura just gave a smile and a wink, “It’s okay Akechi-kun. We all made the same mistake.”

 

He could hear Robin Hood chuckling in his mind.

 

* * *

 

**AKIRA (Part 2)**

 

Thing’s were slowing down in LeBlanc so Akira took the opportunity to glance at his phone.

 

Last message was from a few minutes ago saying they were on their way.

 

Akira shook his head, he needed to be patient. If he could survive nearly two months of Juvie, he could survive a few more minutes waiting for his significant other.

 

Just as he placed his phone back into his pocket, he felt it vibrate. Akira quickly pulled it out and sighed with relief to see the message was from Ryuji. He opened up the messenger app and was greeted with a photo of Ryuji holding up a box of chocolates.

 

 **RYUJI:** DUDE! Check it out, I got some chocolates for V-Day!

 

Akira smirked and typed up his reply.

 

 **AKIRA:** I dunno if chocolates from your mom count.

 

 **RYUJI:** Ha ha very funny.

 

 **RYUJI:** But seriously! This is Girlfriend Chocolate!

 

 **AKIRA:** Oh congratulations. Who’s the lucky girl?

 

After a minute, Ryuji uploaded a photo of him and Ann smiling and throwing peace signs.

 

“Ha! It’s about time!”

 

“Hm? What is?”

 

Akira turned around and saw Sojiro giving him a curious look.

 

“Oh, my friends, Ryuji and Ann? They finally got together for Valentine’s Day.”

 

Sojiro looked confused for a brief moment before replying, “Wait? They weren’t already seeing each other?”

**Author's Note:**

> If you're wondering why Morgana didn't get a section, it mostly cause I wanted to keep this somewhat light and silly and I thought a Morgana section would have end up touching on some of his issues. So I just went with quick little references to him.
> 
> Find me and yell with me about Persona 5 on tumblr @ http://nexttrickanvils.tumblr.com/


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